Fluorescent light bulbs wink.

I love this:

So Matthew loosens the belt around his arm and lets it slide down and off his wrist. He pushes his back off the wall and rolls onto the men's room floor. He pulls his knees up to his chest. He is concerned that he will get tile prints on the side of his face again. It is not long before he is no longer concerned about it.

One of the florescent lights overhead winks at Matthew. It continues to do so repeatedly at irregular intervals. Over the next few hours, Matthew begins to recognize pattens. He finds he is able to translate the blinking into english.

It asks, "How many homosexual librarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

Matthew smiles. "How many?"

The light ceases its flickering for a few minutes. Matthew assumes that it is attempting to translate his english question into its blinking-language. Then he realizes that it isn't capable of understanding him at all. He repeats his answer by blinking his eyes.

The florescent light blinks once.

"One?" blinks Matthew, "That isn't a very funny joke."

"It wasn't a joke," replies the light. "I am only capable of telling the truth."

Matthew has never been able to deal with the truth. He rolls onto his stomach so he won't have to listen to the light anymore.

(original source: The Evil Bunny)